Bugger!!!

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Bugger!!!

Postby IronDog » Tue May 08, 2018 2:11 pm

Welp, looks like I am returning to my old homestead for the weekend. Dad doesn't think mom will last the month, so getting in the truck Thursday morning, turning South for an 11-hour endurance run and trying to spend Mother's Day with mom while I still can. Hopefully she'll still remember me. More importantly, hopefully she won't leave before I get there.

This Alzheimer's/ Dimentia/TIA crap sucks big time.
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Re: Bugger!!!

Postby Crocaneers » Tue May 08, 2018 2:13 pm

Not ever a good trip .. no matter .. she knows you are there. Close all the open doors, brother.

Stay in peace.

Be there for Dad and family. Say what you need to, swallow what you have to.

I wish for more days. Will be praying for sure ID
Last edited by Crocaneers on Tue May 08, 2018 2:21 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Bugger!!!

Postby PrimeMinister » Tue May 08, 2018 2:17 pm

Praying for you. Be there and love your parents every second.
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Re: Bugger!!!

Postby Zarniwoop » Tue May 08, 2018 2:20 pm

Good luck. Be strong.
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Re: Bugger!!!

Postby beardmcdoug » Tue May 08, 2018 2:47 pm

best of luck man, stay strong
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Re: Bugger!!!

Postby Buc2 » Tue May 08, 2018 3:31 pm

IronDog wrote:Welp, looks like I am returning to my old homestead for the weekend. Dad doesn't think mom will last the month, so getting in the truck Thursday morning, turning South for an 11-hour endurance run and trying to spend Mother's Day with mom while I still can. Hopefully she'll still remember me. More importantly, hopefully she won't leave before I get there.

This Alzheimer's/ Dimentia/TIA crap sucks big time.

Sorry to hear this, ID.
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Re: Bugger!!!

Postby Rocker » Tue May 08, 2018 3:48 pm

beardmcdoug wrote:best of luck man, stay strong
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Re: Bugger!!!

Postby Mountaineer Buc » Tue May 08, 2018 3:58 pm

Do what you gotta do.
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Re: Bugger!!!

Postby IronDog » Fri May 18, 2018 6:18 pm

Gah! What a horrible disease.

1st. She is extremely depressed and crying on her bed. Keeps asking what she did to deserve this. "Why am I being punished. I thought I did the right things. I must have done something wrong!" Friggin heart wrenching.

Then 5 minutes later and they come to get her for lunch and it's like someone flipped a toggle switch. She's laughing, flirting with another resident.

Then 10 minutes later they flipped the switch back and back to depressing....

Dad tells me 20 to 30 minutes for the cycles. And you never know what you can expect.

I told him I thought her happy phase was when her 10-yr old mind was most engaged. And when she was upset was when her 81-yr old mind was most active and she knew things weren't right.

She is constantly wanting to go home during that phase. The resident nurses have told him that under no circumstances should he take her home cause he'd never get her back in the facility. Same likely would be the case if he took her out to dinner. He'd never get her out of the car.

But talk about guilt trips.

Went in on Mother's Day and she was sitting in one of the recliners around the TV lounge with everyone else. Might have been 1 person watching the TV. Most were having their post-lunch nap. She was in her happy mode til the movie started. Why the hell would you have a Hunger Games movie on? Well she doesn't like violence so that was a negative. She was fighting off the bad phase until they rolled Mary in. Seems Mary only cries. And I mean the not-quite-silent big-gulp subs. Non-stop. And directly in mom's line of site. Well she kept pointing her out and telling me that it was heart-breaking. I got up and asked the staff if there wasn't anything they could do for her. Their response..."Oh that's just Mary. She always cries. There isn't anything we can do for her"
And that broke mom's happy phase and she got angry and stormed out of the lounge, demanding to be taken home. She hated this place.
They gave her half a valium and she stormed off to her room.

Unfortunately, after dinner found her still in a sour mood, and she said a bunch of nasty things to dad. Things you know she didn't mean.

Try as he might, tho, when she fell and broke her back, and he hurt his trying to pick her up, he realized that he couldn't take care of her alone anymore. Said it was the hardest decision he ever made and it continues to eat at him.

I told Shirley to just point me into traffic. She has no quality of life and just wants to die. I don't want to live like that. Just killed me with that visit. Dad says, chemically, her body, tho frail, is well balanced, according to the drs. That's the curse we live with these days. Modern medicine has figured out how to keep our bodies alive, but the mind leaves them baffled.
Last edited by IronDog on Sat May 19, 2018 9:08 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Bugger!!!

Postby Rocker » Fri May 18, 2018 6:55 pm

ID, thanks for sharing. I can’t begin to imagine how difficult this is for you. PM me if you feel the need.
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